CASTLES IN SCOTLAND
After the wedding in Berlin, I took a day to rest up; then after a week of parties I left for another week of parties (of a different kind) in Scotland. I'm not usually a happy flier but the spirit of the wedding made even the short flights to Amsterdam, Edinburgh and Inverness a pleasure. My spirits were further buoyed by the facts that the Scotland trip was a birthday present from a close friend and that two friends were coming from America to join me the following day. When I arrived in Inverness, I was immediately caught up in the friendly spirit of a small town and a wonderful Scotsman who would be our guide for the week. The Scotsman was a lover of golf who worked part-time guiding strangers through the mysteries of Scottish golf courses. He took care of everything, from starting times to caddies to tour stops to restaurants.
My first golf destination was Royal Dornoch, near Inverness. I was excited about playing golf there. My main purpose in Scotland was to enjoy the history and Dornoch is known as the third oldest course in Scotland, dating from 1616. I stayed at Skibo Castle, which has its own golf courses and practice facility. I was greeted on arrival with a glass of Scotch whiskey and the man whose job it was to keep the glasses filled was never far. The rooms for my friends and me were two miles away from the main building, so they gave me a jeep to use to travel around the grounds. I arrived relatively late, just in time for the haggis ceremony and dinner. Haggis is a traditional Scots sausage including sheep's lungs and heart and various other ingredients. We tasted it and I enjoyed it, despite the ingredients. Our leader recited Robert Burns' Address to a Haggis, which concludes:
Ye Pow'rs, wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o'fare,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking (watery) ware
That jaups (splashes) in luggies (shallow soup bowls)
But, if ye wish her gratefu' prayer
Gie her a haggis!*
After the recital, everyone sat down at large tables so we could get to know one another. Even though it was somewhat artificial, I thought it was an interesting way to create a club-like atmosphere in what really functioned as a hotel. I sat next to a nice woman lawyer from Switzerland who has taken early retirement from her job to work on her golf game. The next day, when I went to the practice facility to prepare for the challenge of Dornoch, she took pictures for me and was like a fellow club member. That's what gave me this week's topic.
I've long believed that friendships develop over a relatively long period of time, naturally, not artificially, after a sufficient time to earn mutual trust and respect. But I actually felt like a friend to this woman I had now met twice. So I want to modify my belief and conclude that if people make an effort to be friends, even if imposed artificially by circumstances, they can have feelings of friendship which are very pleasant and comforting. It's not exactly like being friends but it's close. So don't wait patiently for friendships to develop naturally. Make an effort to act like a friend even before you are one. At worst, it will give you the pleasant illusion of friendship and at best, it will hasten the development of friendships.
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* Burns use of dialect is an interesting characteristic of his poetry and I want someday to write about it. However, the translations here are my own without much research. I think they're accurate but check them out yourselves if you have any difficulties understanding.
[The picture Friends at the Castle, in my scrapbook, was taken at the main building at Skibo Castle. Our rooms were in a smaller separate castle about two miles away. The smaller castle, set in a forested area, was built in a similar style to the main building and had wonderful appointments.]
9-9-02
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