FRIENDS AGAIN (Germany, Part 5)
I've written and thought about friendship before but, as in so many other things, my recent trip to Germany gave me new thoughts, helped me understand friendship better. I've always sought to understand friendship, tried to see how friendships are formed and last, how friendships fail and how they can be rebuilt. One thing I know is that friendships tend to last, even with extended periods of separation, with differences that arise, with difficulties, without shared interests, through the inevitable changes that occur as people age and mature. It's almost magical how powerful friendship is. But I saw something I had never seen before at the wedding in Germany. The groom's former wife, who was also friends with many of the guests, had become a good friend to both her former husband and his new wife.
When I first saw her, I thought about the the rarity of the event. Then I thought about what a wonderful person she is. I thought about her kindness, her serenity, her giving nature. I also thought about the wedding couple: After all, friendship requires both sides. You can't be a friend to someone unless he or she is a friend to you. But finally I thought about the magic of friendship: Once again, friendship's power transcended all expectations, all difficulties, to help bring us together in celebration. I sensed that everyone appreciated her, saw her presence as an important part of the ceremony and the week-long festivities.
Friendship is like that. No matter what happens, no matter how much time passes, in the end we have to be true to our friends, as our friends will be to us. We must think about our friends, not take them for granted, keep in touch, be there when needed. If we do, our friends will do the same for us and that's what makes life livable. Without friends, the best of times are barren and gray. With friends, the worst of times can be borne. Value your friends. Be a friend to others. Even if your life is all blue skies and sunshine, your friends will make it better.
[Thoughts about the scrapbook: Several people asked me to explain why I included some of the new pictures in my scrapbook. I'll explain the pictures from Scotland later on when I write about Scotland. The German hotel was meaningful to me because of my fellow guests and because of the wonderful staff. I'll be writing more about the staff next week. Even though the picture is prosaic, it reminds me of the great service I received from the staff and the wonderful setting in a residential neighborhood of Berlin. The reception picture is a favorite even though (or perhaps because) I moved the camera a little when I took the picture. The motion accidentally captured my excitement as the guests gathered for the beginning of the reception. As inept as the photographer was, the picture shows the good time everyone was having. The party continued until 7:00 a.m. the next day and the same spirit continued.]
8-26-02
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