HEDONOPHOBIA REVISITED
I've thought about the unrelated topics of horoscopes and hedonophobia before. Hedonophobia is the irrational fear of pleasure, the fear of happiness. I think I suffered from this phobia for many years. Looking back, I believe that, for reasons I cannot explain, I was afraid to enjoy things. I've tried to find explanations for this strange fear but, apart from the possibility of lessons of my childhood that I've now forgotten, I haven't been able to come up with a good explanation. One clue is that I've always enjoyed reading. It's possible that I was taught as a child that only serious pursuits such as reading brought permissible pleasure. By definition, hedonophobia makes it difficult if not impossible to enjoy anything. In recent years, I've become better at enjoying things, at taking pleasure, at actively seeking enjoyment. A lot of my life in the last few years has been devoted to pleasant contacts with other people, to vacations, to the pursuit of hobbies and interests. I don't know if I'm cured yet but I'm certainly doing better at combating this phobia.
You might think that horoscopes are completely unrelated to phobias. While I'm not completely sold, I believe horoscopes can help us think about issues, without believing that they are an infallible guide to our conduct. Although I know that horoscopes must be written generally to provide general appeal, that they must be applicable to many people every day, I still enjoy reading a horoscope that seems as if it were written for me individually. Hence, I was pleasantly surprised to read this in a recent horoscope:
So why are you sulking? Could it be because cheerfulness makes you uncomfortable? Yet, the goal of Cancer is to be lighthearted and adventuresome. However, it is just that: a goal, not a "given." In astrology, Air allows for optimism and playfulness and Cancer is a Water sign. That may be why you're having some trouble with the joyous mood of the day.
So maybe hedonophobia was written for me in the stars.
Whatever the cause, the ill effects of this phobia, avoidance of pleasure, failure to seek pleasure, the refusal to accept pleasure when offered, are real. However, as in so many cases, the recognition of the problem leads to the solution. The way to defeat phobias is to confront them and behave fearlessly. Confronting the feared object in some non-threatening context and learning to eliminate the fear will eventually cure the phobia. So the cure for hedonophobia is to experience pleasure and learn that pleasure doesn't injure us.
Without consulting experts, without professional assistance, I think I found the path to a cure. I've learned to enjoy things and actively seek pleasant experiences simply by doing. I think there's a broader lesson here: We all have fears, although they may not rise to the level of phobias. The way to defeat our fears is to recognize them, analyze them rationally and confront them in a safe way. In that way, we can learn to live our lives without fear, to look forward with hope, to be optimistic. That's a lot better way to live.
8-16-04
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