LOYALTY(2)
I've written before about loyalty. It's a quality I value highly, a quality which facilitates many relationships, which engenders trust, which makes people comfortable and enables them to move forward without "watching their backs". I think we all seek loyalty from those around us and we try to be loyal in return. We may not consciously analyze loyalty but at some level we constantly evaluate loyalty in others, in ourselves. I think we all look for loyalty and we all look for those to whom we can be loyal.
I was struck by a recent survey that analyzed loyalty in the workplace. The survey evaluated managers' views of their loyalty to subordinates and vice versa and compared the managers' views to those of their subordinates, There was a significant difference. Where managers viewed themselves as loyal, subordinates thought they were loyal at a greatly reduced rate. Similarly, and perhaps causally related, subordinates didn't express loyalty to their managers at the same rate as the managers expected.
It occurred to me that this difference is significant: If subordinates believe their managers aren't loyal it's the same as if they aren't. To be valued and produce the desired response, loyalty must be visible. Again, we may not consciously think about it, but if we don't perceive loyalty in those we need to trust, there is no loyalty, notwithstanding its presence in objective fact. And, perhaps, if we don't perceive loyalty in them, we are unable to feel loyal to them.
What can we do? If I'm right, being loyal is not enough. We also must demonstrate our loyalty for it to be appreciated. But must we fall on our swords to demonstrate loyalty or must we be loyal at all times and in all circumstances, even when to do so would betray our own ideals? I don't think so. I think we must first be loyal to ourselves, stick to our principles and do the right thing. It's not loyal to another person to let them require adherence to dishonest conduct, for example. To be loyal in such circumstances is to be a sycophant. But where loyalty is the right thing and to be loyal is inconvenient or difficult to us, then we must openly and gladly display our loyalty.
Be loyal but be loyal only to those who deserve it. Display your loyalty; otherwise loyalty will be ignored.
6-17-02
[This will be the last shoulder update, at least until after my summer trip. I've made enough progress that every update would likely be the same from now on. I see only blue skies from here; if that changes, I'll keep you posted. I'd like once again to thank my surgeon and my therapist. Without their skills, I wouldn't be so optimistic.]
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