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Resolutions Update

                                        My resolution for this year was to redouble my efforts to learn from others, to concentrate on their interests and wants and needs, and use what I learn in this way to give them something. I noted that if I can learn how to help others better, I'll help myself. If I can bring something good to the life of someone else, I'll feel better about myself. I'm not being altruistic: Only by making myself useful to someone else can I really enjoy life. This is my update on my progress in keeping this resolution.

                                        I confess that  that I don't feel as good about my progress this year as I have in the past. It's harder to help others than I would have expected. That's partly because it's harder to know what people really need and when you do know it's hard to give it. Knowing their wants is somewhat easier, but I often think that there is too big a gap between wants and needs; satisfying some people's wants will leave them needier. Even when I can  conclude that I know what people need, it's often too late to make a significant difference. In many cases, the need could only be satisfied in the past. By the time I see it, it's too late. It also often happens that I don't have the resources to give them what they need. And it's also true that many people resist revealing their needs and letting someone else help them.

                                        Notwithstanding the problems, I continue to seek knowledge about how to help, to use the knowledge I've gained and to make a difference. In many cases, the value of my efforts won't be apparent for a long time. I may not see the results of my efforts but I still think it's worthwhile to try. I hope I'm not fooling myself when I say I am helping, I am making a difference in the lives of a few people. My resources may be feeble but the effort is often enough for those I'm trying to help. They appreciate that someone cares and that alone makes a difference.

                                        At the end of the day, there's only one thing we're all seeking anyway. All of the work we do, all of the effort we put forth, all of the energy we deploy has but one goal. No matter whether the immediate goal is money, honor, trophies or recognition, we only want one thing and, I believe, we only need one thing: Love. If I can let people know they're loved, their other problems will pale and eventually fade away. Maybe even letting them know that they're eligible for love is enough.

                                         On this United States holiday I have more time than usual to reflect on these issues and I feel more strongly than ever that if we can bring love to others we will eventually be loved. If not by the others, by ourselves.

5-31-04

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